Monday....sigh

Yes, it has returned again....

My weekend was HOT!  and not in the good way, either.

On a van that broke down, had to wait for an hour for a ride...sweated half to death.

Attend two church services yesterday, and BOTH air conditioning systems were broken...in Florida...where the average temp yesterday was around 85 degrees.

So, my weekend was long, hot, and tiring.

And now I'm back to Monday.

I need a weekend from my weekend.

Getting Seasoned (short one today)

I love older people.  They have the best stories.

I wanna get to that age where, when I reminisce about some of the things I used to do, I leave young people in awe.  "Dang, you used to do that?"

But it means, once again, gotta take of myself.  Doctor's office again.  Sigh...

But I'm happy that I did.  May have averted a problem before it became one.  I am doing what is necessary to prevent it from going any further, thereby avoiding the "terminal" diagnosis.

All in an effort to make it to 100.  (Yes, I plan on being here for a century.)

Gotta make more changes.

But it's part of the seasoning process....so Imma marinate over here and do this for me and my 3 babies (1 niece, 2 nephews).

So I can tell them stories of survival, of peace, of hardwork, of happiness and joy, hard times and tears, but most of all: how I LIVED.

The Ultimate Playlist....

It has been raining blessings so far this week....gotta give God a shout out...so here's the playlist for "When God Is Blessing You"


Thank You Lord, For All You've Done for Me - Walter Hawkins

Lift Him Up - Hezekiah Walker

Total Praise - Richard Smallwood

He's Been Just That Good - Ricky Dillard and New G

Jesus Will - Anita Wilson

All The Man I Need - Whitney Houston

And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going - Jennifer Holliday/Jennifer Hudson (the part that hits me about God "You're the best Man I've ever know, and there's no way I can go...I mean, there's no way, no no no way I'm living without you! I don't wanna be free....I'm staying, yes I am staying...and You, You're Gonna Love Me!")

So, what's your playlist for the Father today?  Have you said "thank you"? How about "I Love You for You" today?

Playlist ready.

Words in the Key of Creation

If you know me, you know I'm constantly listening to music.  It is one of the "sure" pleasures in my life.  Music relaxes me. Music hypes me up.  Music takes me other places in my mind.  Music is...

And I'll leave it at that.

Writing, to me, is a lot like that.  I capture snippets of my life and pen it on paper or type it onscreen.  Sometimes it may be read, sometimes not.

But I am getting to the point where I've gotta DO something with it.  I've got to create something with my words that will leave an impact.

So, I am going to attempt to write 1 chapter a day until I'm done.  I may post excepts, or not.  Depends on how I'm feeling about it.  

But the message is clear - If I create and write it, it will be read!

Happy Mother's Day

I posted the first picture on my mother's 75th birthday.  It was when she was teaching me how to walk.  My mother was my first cheerleader.  Whenever I thought I wanted to do something, she made sure I was ready for it, and pushed me to be the BEST at it.

I posted the second picture when we were at our sorority's Regional Black and Bling Banquet.  She has always been TOO fly...that picture just captured it. From what my grandfather (rest his soul in peace) had told me, she got it from my grandmother, who was style personified.  They both believed in looking their very best.  Always.  As one of my girlfriends told me: "your Mama ALWAYS be hooked up!"

My mother is quiet at first meeting her.  She is first, and foremost, a lady. She's very laid-back, and some people have mistaken this for being stuck-up or unfriendly.  Not at all.  In fact, she's very funny, once you get to know her. Her best friend said that she missed her calling for being a comedian - yes, she is THAT funny.

She's very serious when it comes to two things: God and her family.  I never doubted for one second my mother's relationship with God.  She's not a vocal Christian, she's an ACTION Christian.  She will pray.  She will help. She will teach.  She will do what is needed and necessary.  She will serve.  I couldn't be who I was, if I hadn't watched her.  She is FIERCELY protective of her family. You will not get away with harming my father, my brother, me, my niece and nephews without her addressing it in some fashion.  She won't tell you off, but she'll convey her feelings in such a manner, you'll know you've gone TOO far with her loved ones.

My mother was a teacher for over 40 years.  She was my very first teacher. Her fondest memory was of a bus trip, where a lady wanted to see who was the two-year-old reading all the signs (me in the seat with her).  She says that teaching me and my brother before we went to school was her main goal.  She didn't want us to go empty-headed.  We needed to know some things: our ABC's, our colors, our name and address, who our parents were, our phone number.  By the time we did get to school, we knew all that and more.

But the one thing that my mother taught me, and it's only recently that I've begun to realize this:  she taught me how to handle adversity.  Whenever she had illnesses (and it hasn't been that many, bless God), even though they seemed serious, she went through them with NO complaints.  She didn't sweat the small stuff.  She didn't even advertise it - no one knew (she's very private). Even when I thought it was serious, she was adamant in treating them like they weren't a big deal...and then it turned out that way.  She taught me faith:  that even though it may seem big, if she trusted God, He'd handle it.  When I told her about some things the doctor told me, she said: "Oh, they say those things to scare you. You can't let it.  Just keep going.  It'll be alright. Pray and let God handle it."

So when I hear: 
"girl, ooh, I love that suit, how'd you put that together?" 
"I used to think you were kinda mean/standoffish, but girl, you are a nut! why are you so funny?"
"why do you enjoy helping out so much?"
"you know you love you some family!" 
"your teaching style is unlike anything I've seen!" 
"Renee knows everything" (my bestie Regina's words)  
"how do you handle the tough times so smoothly?"

My response is very simple:  I GET IT FROM MY MAMA!

Faith Instead of Fear

There are some things that are facing me right now that seem like they want to be a giant in my life.

However, I REFUSE to let them swell up to that point!

How and why? you ask.

Simple.

How? by not feeding the fear it is trying to cultivate in my mind and spirit.

Why? "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of Power, Love and a Sound Mind, never being ashamed of the testimony of the Lord."

Fred Hammond said it like this: "No! I won't be afraid of the terror by day, nor the hand of my enemy! I can stand my ground, with the Lord on my side! For the snares and the traps they have set will NOT succeed!"

You know the rest.

My Faith is BIGGER than my fear.  That defeats the enemy. Every. Single. Time!

Plain and simple.

Good Hair (This is a SOAP BOX moment)

The picture to the left (or above) is me, about a year ago.  I had decided to chop off the perm and go completely natural.

I had seen a picture of my hair on my phone from 5 months earlier, from where my hair was straightened, by heat and there was still a little bit of my hair that had perm in it.

It was thin and lifeless (i.e. unhealthy).

It was then, when I decided - no more perms/relaxers for me.

I was going natural.

Being a good black girl, I knew I had to do something with my hair for the time being.

Say it with me: "braids are a black girl's good friend."  

So at the end of November 2014, I started the transition back to natural.

I kept my braids until about April 2015. I took them out, and did a final perm chop.  That picture is the first time I had not had any chemicals in my hair in a long time.

And I loved it.  It looked HEALTHY.

It's still that way today.  I've cut it, braided it, weaved it, crocheted it, etc.  But it was still my hair with very little or no heat at all.

And to me it is beautiful.  

"Well, where is all of this coming from?" You might be wondering.  

Glad you asked.

I had, about year or so earlier from this picture, watched this movie called Good Hair, which was hosted and produced by Chris Rock.  In the movie, he discusses the extent that black women have gone through to embrace the so-called "European" look (weave, perms, relaxers, wigs, blowouts, etc) all with one purpose in mind: to be beautiful by the world's terms.

If you know me, I don't even KNOW HOW TO DO WHAT THE WORLD DOES! The Sheila E. timbali drummer that beats Motherland solo in my head is loud, and I can do my own dance to her rhythm. Not a follower.

Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder.  And truth be told, I think brothers of all colors would appreciate the feel of soft hair, whether curly, kinky or straight.

But the most disturbing thing about the need to have "straight" (read: GOOD) hair is the chemical process to get it that way.  Scientists are now finding out that the chemicals being used to get our hair "straight" has been the main cause of fibroids and tumors, which are especially prevalent in: African-American women.

The mere fact that there were chemical burns and scabs on my scalp after the process told me: "sumthin' bout this process isn't healthy" - not anymore.  So I stopped.  I haven't had the "headache" (ladies, you know what I mean) since getting my last perm over 2 years ago.  And then when I realized I had BALD SPOTS from where the scabs from the burns were, I said: that's it. I'm done with this nonsense.

Good hair, to me, means healthy hair.  Who says "bone straight" hair is best for African-American women?  I think my natural sisters look too cute: kinky, curly, twisted, blowout.  And the babies?? OMG - the babies are too cute!!!

My personal opinion is this: do what makes you feel good, but not at the sake of your health.  Find other options (and, yes, they are out there!) to get the straight look, without frying your hair! But most important: find something that makes you look and FEEL good!

Just my two cents for the day!!

P.S. - if you thought this was going to be a comment/rant about "Becky with the good hair" - I couldn't care less - all Imma say on that is: Beyonce is GREAT at marketing! IJS