Welp, it's been here for a minute, but it needs to be official: CLAPBACK SEASON IS HERE TO STAY!!
How so, you might ask?
Glad that you did.
Just yesterday, Jussie Smollet had to sit a troll down for coming at him...and I was like: "don't folks know he's learning his game from two of the all-time MASTERS of the clapback, both real AND fictional???" Terrence and Taraji have been schooling the young man. Click here for the story.
We have, since the inception of Orange satan's decision to run as commander-in-chief (insert laughter and side-eye slaying here), had a season of just...IDIOTIC COMMENTS FROM THE PEANUT GALLERY. A very small part of it, has been spot on.
However the HUGE (and I mean MONSTROUS) part of it has been, creeping up on the borders of "exactly what were you thinking when you posted/said this? You need a fact/spell/sense checker..."
But I digress.
There is an unwritten rule about talking about people, i.e. "throwing shade" - if you are going to come at a person, best make sure your house is not glass fortified. Otherwise, we throwing rocks.
For some of y'all, BOULDERS have left your hands.
Let's review the timeline that CLAPBACK SEASON began (at least for me it did):
1. June 16th - Taylor Swift/Yeezus/KK - Kim (who, if you don't know me, is famous for nothing AT ALL) showed Taylor "don't come for my man...he ran the lyrics by you, you said okay, NOW you wanna act all hurt when it comes out. No, heffa...I got proof!!" And. Posted. The. Message.
Award for Savage Receipts - goes to Mrs. Kanye West, Kim Kardashian!
2. July 18th - Melania Trump, in a display of epic FAIL, decided to steal portions of First Lady (of Style and Grace and these United States) Michelle Obama. FORGETTING that people actually LISTENED to Michelle's speech, and took notes. Jesse Williams (WokeBae4LIFE) instantly took to TWITTER and began a roast-fest of such epic proportions, the likes of which have NEVA been seen until recently. Which also begat the hashtag: #FamousMelaniaTrumpQuotes
Award for Savage Hashtag - goes to WokeBae, Jesse Williams
3. August - The Olympics. Where the world decides to get past the BS and show the politicians - "it's really not all that serious." Simone Biles, Madison Kocian, Gabby Douglas, Alexa Morena and Aly Raisman straight killed the gymnastics world - it was cause for celebration. Three of them took to Twitter to show their celebration, not to mention their swimsuits - and then foolishness raised its' ugly head.
All people saw were three beautiful, in shape girls, celebrating their win at the Olympics. This troll decided to body shame them. And then, this beautiful girl named Crystal went for the ultimate clapback WELP!
Award for the Savage Twitterply - Crystal!
4. August 26, 2016 - Colin Kaepernick (my other other WokeBae) sits down during the National Anthem before his game with the Green Bay Packers. The chaos that ensued from that point... errybody and they great-uncle had something to say. However, the three images that I'm about to post are to show everyone: if you HAVE done dirt, and I mean of the MUDDY variety, you first need to have a Coliseum full of seats. Then, you have also forfeited your rights to come for anyone that DID NOT SEND FOR YOU!! Cases in point:
Tony Stewart, baby - just....no. No. NO. By the way, I mean NO!!
Ben, um, till you learn how to keep your hands to yourself - go sit in the corner. Do not come for Colin, who chose to sit for civil rights. Agree to that, please.
Award for the Overall SAVAGE Clapback Category: Twitter/Black Twitter....and dismount!
MORAL OF THIS STORY: If you are going to throw stones, make sure your target has the same amount of baggage as you do. Otherwise, leave them alont. Don't come for nobody that didn't send for you...
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